6 Days

Posted in Thoughts by Sandra on October 8, 2008

Lately I’ve been tired. Before this week, it was working on the guild website – which is now live. I’m very proud of it, but I know I’ve done nothing great. A lot of it is just uploading files to the server, configuring, and positioning modules. The difficult part, I think, is adjusting the modules so that they would look good on the template, and writing a few basic articles (Druid 101, anyone?) so that the website wouldn’t look so empty.

I’ve been asking people to write “columns” for the site, but am afraid that I may be aiming for too much. After all, Asians don’t really use their guild website much. A lot of communication is in-game, MSN, or in real life as many of us are friends. Even with Laus Azure Divum, the pattern was similar – forums weren’t as lively as American, or European forums.

The greatest satisfaction I would get from finishing this site is not being complimented on how good it is, but on having real people use it as much as possible to facilitate their interactions with guild members. (Imagine my disappointment when I realized that till this day, The Murloc himself still hasn’t registered…).

Oh well.

So I have 6 days left.

It still feels like I have a lot to pack, but that’s because a huge part of my packing will be my clothes, and I can’t really pack them all till I’ve done my last load of laundry come Monday evening. I’d prolly try not to go out on Tuesday, and so wear old clothes I can just toss after. Don’t want to leave any physical mess behind at all, so I can leave with a clear conscience that I’m not deliberately making my mother suffer.

Snort.

This week till next Monday is packed with meeting friends. John, my ex-tutor for math during my ‘O’ levels… Loy and Peiya, ex-partners at Starbucks, Aurorine and Charmander, schoolmates and fellow druids, a few guild members who’re close to me in Singapore, and my closest friend in university, Shiyi. Ironically, this is where my general real-life aloofness is helping me, because nothing is holding me back – definitely not friendships!

I find it difficult to fall asleep each night now. I imagine how each day my new life would be like from the moment I walk upon Australian soil. It excites me, and daunts me a little. What if I were to react in entirely opposite ways to how we’ve imagined I could be, for example, withdraw further into myself, not want anything, and be afraid of everything?…

Well at least there’s Illidion. Strangers in a new home, loved by one man.

… Nothing like competition to get one off her arse to make herself a better person.

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